Emmett and the Bird Man
by CaramelApple74
Summary: Emmett and Rosalie go for a walk in the park, and run into some trouble when they come across an elderly man feeding birds. Contains Emmett killing a duck, getting arrested, and joining a gang in jail. ONE-SHOT. Originally part of a multiple chapter drabble fic, but I decided to make it into a one-shot.


**Disclaimer: I do not own Twilight or its characters, I only made the plot for this one-shot.**

The Cullens stayed in Forks for eight more years after Bella was transformed into a vampire. After that, they moved to to Vermont in December, but only ended up staying there for three months. There was a little problem concerning one of the Cullen men, and the family had to choose between moving away or having him locked in a mental institution. They weren't happy at all, especially Esme, she was absolutely livid. Esme had actually contemplated having him locked up since it was his own stupidity that got that the family into the whole mess.

It was nearing Valentine's day, and Emmett decided to take his wife, Rosalie, through a stroll in the city park. The weather was perfect for a Cullen to be outside; it was cold and cloudy, not a hint of sunshine anywhere. The park had a beautiful little pond filled with water lilies and surrounded by adorable baby ducks and their mothers. Benches were placed strategically around the pond, and there were stone pathways woven throughout the area leading to flat grass fields and play structures for children. It was such a picturesque place, and although it was chilly out, there were many people inhabiting the park.

Emmett took Rosalie's hand and entwined it in his own, swinging their joined hands between them. He had a goofy grin plastered onto his face, and Rosalie fluttered her eyelashes unabashedly. Although Rosalie and Emmett were more of a physical couple, they did have their moments where they didn't need to say or act on anything to show their love for each other; they just had to be together, it didn't matter where they were. Their love for one another was timeless and true.

The two were just passing one of the benches, intending to circle around the park once more before heading home, when a whistle rang clear in the air next to Rosalie.

Emmett froze in his tracks, turning around slowly, menacingly, to see who had just whistled at his wife. He was at a loss for words trying to think of who in their right mind would ever dare to do such a thing. Emmett was standing right beside her and holding her hand for God's sake! Couldn't this man see that Rosalie was taken? Was he stupid? Blind? Who Emmett saw though when he faced the perpetrator absolutely disgusted him.

There was an old man sitting on the bench, a gray beard being the only hair on his face and head, and he had on thick black rounded glasses and an old newsboy hat. His clothes were tattered and faded, and a cane was leaning against his right knee. This old geezer was trying to hit on Emmett's wife? Who did he think he was, Hugh Hefner? Well, Emmett certainly wasn't going to tolerate this.

"Hey, you senile shit! Just who in the hell do you think you are?" Emmett roared, not caring at all that people were looking at him, or that he was cursing out an elderly man. This guy just broke a through a boundary.

"Who's there?" the old man croaked, looking around wildly. "Could you tap me on the shoulder so I can know where you are?"

Emmett's face screwed up in anger; this old jackass knew exactly where Emmett was, he did just whistle at his wife as she walked past him. "How about I just kick your saggy ass for whistling at my wife?" he boomed, fists clenched tight at his sides.

Meanwhile while all of this was going down, Rosalie stood on the sidelines trying to stifle her laughter. She had seen the old man when he whistled, and she knew for a fact that he wasn't whistling at her, he was looking straight at Emmett. The old guy was gay! Oh, Emmett was going to love this! "Emmett," Rosalie hissed, trying to get his attention.

"What Rose? I'm about to teach this old dog a new trick, it's called a dropkick," Emmett replied, never breaking his gaze on the man.

"Emmett, just listen to me," she said, beginning to fail at holding in her giggles now.

"Well hurry up and say it. I haven't got all day to wait and teach this guy that he can't be flirting with married women!"

"He whistled at you! He was looking right at you!" she exclaimed, laughing loudly at Emmett's face.

Emmett was utterly aghast at this. Terrified. He had just been hit on by another man! An old, wrinkly one too! Oh, the horror. To make matters even worse though, the guy looked straight at Emmett and whistled again!

Emmett quickly recounted in his mind everything he had learned in high school about what to do when approached by a creep like this. He did the first and most obvious thing he could think of; he screamed for help. "RAPE!" Emmett shouted, startling everyone within the vicinity. "RAPE! RAPE! HE'S A PREDATOR!"

Rosalie was laughing so hard at this that she was laying on the grass and clutching her stomach, unable to contain her mirth. Emmett was running around in a circle and flailing his arms like a moron, screaming about how he thought he old man was a child predator. She had never witnessed anything so funny in her entire life, and she had been alive for quite some time now.

Children started screaming too, covering their ears and running to hide next to their parents, crying along the way. Emmett had just traumatized them all for life. The old man though, kept whistling. Rosalie caught this, and saw that a trail of ducks were waddling towards the man. It was then she noticed that he also had a loaf of bread with him. Suddenly, everything clicked into place in her head. The old man was here to feed the ducks, and he whistled in order for them to come to him. He was blind too, which explained the thick glasses and how he didn't know where anything was. She laughed harder at this, thinking about how ridiculous it was that somehow this whole scene got blown out proportion. Emmett thought the man was a predator, and the surrounding parents and children thought Emmett was a psycho.

Right when things were already bad though, the situation got about ten times worse. While running in circles Emmett stepped on a mother duck, and it's blood went all over the place. Everything got quiet as the people all witnessed Emmett murder the poor animal, and he himself stood still, but only for a moment. Emmett's eyes zeroed in on the dead bird and turned as black as night. His whole body tensed, and Rosalie, noticing his abrupt shift in demeanor, got to her feet and went to his side.

"Emmett, don't you dare! There's people watching, let's get out of here." she said in a hushed tone.

Emmett didn't pay her any attention though. Instead, he picked up the dead duck and sunk his fangs into its neck. Rosalie smacked a palm to her forehead, knowing that all hell was about to break lose.

It sure did.

The screaming resumed, and parents were rushing their children back to their cars while also calling the police. Emmett continued to drain the bird of it's blood, and then proceeded to throw it's limp body into the middle of the field when he was done with it.

Authorities sprinted into the park minutes later and immediately detained Emmett for disturbing the peace and animal abuse. Rosalie was forced to call Carlisle and have him go and get Emmett out of jail and possibly a mental institution. After all, it wasn't normal for humans to see someone drinking an animal's blood.

Rosalie went back home after getting off the phone with a furious Carlisle, and angrily awaited her husband's arrival. Oh, she would give him a piece of her mind when he got back. There was no doubt that they would have to move now since Emmett scarred the town for life, and people would obviously tell their friends what they saw happen at the park. Hell, it might even be on the news.

At the police station, after changing into his jumpsuit and getting his mugshot, Emmett declined his offer at a free phone call-he knew Rose would have contacted Carlisle by now. He did, however, get put into a cell with some very interesting guys. They were covered in tattoos and stuck together like a group. In the hour and a half he was in the cell with them, he manged to snag a spot in their gang! He was now a proud member of the SFSG, or the Smiley Face Street Gang. It sounded pretty bad-ass to him. His fun was short lived though, because Carlisle bailed him out and took him home.

"Pack your things son, we're leaving tonight. The police officers were thinking about sending you to a mental hospital for drinking the duck's blood. What were you thinking?" Carlisle asked, disappointed at Emmett.

"I was thinking that I was thirsty and Daisy tasted nice," Emmett replied innocently. "But we can't move, I have to go to the main house tomorrow at nine to get officially initiated."

"Initiated for what?" Carlisle cried, shaking his head.

"The gang I joined, the Smiley Face Street Gang. They guys in my cell said I was perfect to join them."

"You joined a gang!" Carlisle screeched.

"Yeah, is that a bad thing?"

Carlisle didn't say anything back to him, he just looked at Emmett's mugshot sitting on the dash board. In the photograph, Emmett was grinning like the Cheshire Cat and had blood and feathers all over his face. Carlisle turned the radio on at that moment, and 'Jesus Take The Wheel' was playing. He couldn't have said anything better himself if he tried.

* * *

**Sooo... Emmett murdered Daisy Duck. Interesting? Creepy? Funny?**

**What about the smiley face street gang? I got that idea because some girls at my school one day stuck smiley face stickers on their shirts and were told to take them off by the principal, because she thought they were some kind of gang emblem! I know, that's going a little too far with rules right?**

**I hope you liked the fic! **

**I like getting constructive criticism, so if you think there's anything I can do to improve this then let me know!**

**Thanks for reading!**

**~CaramelApple74~**


End file.
